Swami Vivekanand, We Need You

No, my memory is not failing me. My friend Mahesh, who hated Mathematics in general and Calculus in particular and to an extent where he considered leaving Integration for option for his 12th standard examination, often wished that he were Swami Vivekanand. With the photographic memory as Swamiji was claimed to have, he wanted to read a page, memorize it and tear it from the book, roll into a ball and aim it at the dustbin. Nor do I wish to deliver a speech like Swamiji did at Chicago where this master of oratory left the brothers and sisters gasping. My presentations laced with limited wit and more of sleaze are enough to impress the small audience that I have once in a while. And I do not aim to be selfless as Swamiji to hold the knife by its blade. But Swamiji, I still need you.
Now, what has happened is that I have a Dart board in my new house at Pune. Now before you arrive at any conclusions, let me clarify, I do not want to worship Swamiji for concentration power. With whatever concentration I possess or luck as the critic in you might say, I have been able to hit the bull's eye thrice, which is more than the number of hits all my roomies put together have had at it. But that is not the only record I hold. The top most hole on the wall is because of my misfired shot. And so is the left most one. Yes, I am also guilty for piercing that plastic folder lying not very close to the dart board. And I am not the only one who misfires. All of us combined have missed so many times that there now is an additional circle around the dart board. This circle of holes in the white wall is something that we need to hide from the landlord, whom I have not seen till date but I suppose is a nice person from what I have heard from Ajit. That day when he happened to knock at our door, Rajinder was careful to open the door to the minimum possible extent so as the landlord cannot have a peep at the wall. But then, that was only a temporary solution. Datta has come out with a permanent solution. A big poster of Swamiji to hide the wall. I am sure Swamiji with his serene face and captivating eyes will serve the purpose.

Uncle Neel

Well Well Well. Uncle Sam happens to be the national personification of the United States. But Uncle Neel, let me clarify, does not stand for United Nations. It so happened, that I had a holiday on Wednesday on account of Holi, and Subh and me decided to go to Sinhagad for some trekking. Dressed in my oldest shirt, which I wear only in my bed, I set out for Sinhagad. The oldest shirt was worn so that I do not lose a newer shirt to some water balloon mixed with oil paint. Most people in Pune played dry Holi as opposed to dirty wet Holi they play in my area in Bombay. When I was just out of my building, I saw this cute kid, face smeared with various colours and with a water balloon in his right hand, walk towards me and say, "Uncle, can I throw the balloon at you?". I politely refused. But the point is he called me 'Uncle'. Damn, I am getting old :-(

One More Reason To Hate My Landlady

In addition to the 10 reasons I published, here is one more reason why I hate my landlady. My landlady is a big cheater. I was thinking whether I should unmask her on my blog. If I disclose the details on my blog that would mean that I am getting personal on my blog, something which this blog is not intended for, but not that I have not done this in the past. For instance, when I was given bad service by the KSRTC, I bad mouthed Pasha on my blog. And to support me to make her information public, I have two very good reasons. Reason One : She is bad mouthing me whenever she gets a chance and whenever she meets anyone that we know in common. Reason two : I want to spread awareness about this dirty old lady so that none of you(I have a reasonable readership in my company) gets trapped and stays as a tenant in her house.

Let me now set the background for you. I stayed in that house for about 2 years and I had kept Rs 12500(about 300 USD) as a security deposit which my landlady had promised to return when I vacate the house. I left the house and Bangalore on 17th Feb and I was promised that the deposit would be returned by 1st March. When the old lady finally returned the deposit, in addition to the admissible deductions as stated in the legal agreement, she deducted an additional 2000 bucks. Any guesses why this money was deducted? Scratch your brains. She deducted this money because I posted her letter two days late. And what letter was it? It was some form sent to her car dealer in which she said she had praised him for his service. I seriously doubt that she is capable of praising anyone but then that is what she stated. I knew my landlady is a stupid lady but then what I did not know was she can be stupid enough to think of such a reason to swallow my money. There could have been better reasons that she could have given. She could have stated that she was a thief and I would have accepted that. Would this one not sound more genuine? And now when I phone her, she does not even have courtesy to speak to me. She just hangs the phone. But yes, once she spoke with me for a minute and she said, " Neel, be a gentleman and forget your 2000 bucks". The cunning lady knows very well that Neel is 1000 kms away and cannot do anything except a phone call a day. All this after I searched all the shops for the type of rat poison she wanted so that the rats do not nibble the wires of her new car. All this after the time and efforts I wasted in mailing some niece and wishing her on her birthday on her behalf(See the pic. Click on the image to enlarge. IMAGE REMOVED AFTER SOMEONE COMPLAINED ABOUT PRIVACY ISSUES.All the grammatical mistakes to be attributed to this former English teacher). All this after so many favours.

Just to clarify, my landlady is no poor lady. She is filthy rich but stingy. Infact, she has sold her house for Rs 65 Lakhs(0.15 Million USD) and will be shifting out soon. In the mean time, I am sure she would look for tenants. So if you are looking for a house in Bangalore, take care and avoid this landlady.


Details :

Owner Name : Ms. Satyabhama
Address : House No 43, 7th Main, 19th Cross, BTM Stage 2, Bangalore 560076.
Telephone : 080-26784241 (Unique key)


Related Articles :
1. Ten Reasons Why I Hate My Landlady
2. Slap On The Face